A sleepless Sunday night (due to a poorly baby) meant that we first saw Monday through slightly puffy, red-tinged eyes that definitely needed to be shut for longer. As Rufus came and joined the ‘party’ that Billy was single-handedly conducting in our bed, the week had begun and I would say that we were feeling fragile.
Fragile at the start of a big week.
Big for books as the website is nearly up and running, the first event is happening right now and hopefully some sales are around the corner.
Unexpectedly a big week for my emotions, alongside the book-selling anticipations. Heightened, no doubt, by a lack of sleep, homesickness has hit. It’s been burbling along under the surface all along, with occasional tearful eruptions on Jonathan’s shoulder, but I can’t seem to push this feeling back down at the moment. It’s a longing for friends and family and familiarity.
Nearly four weeks in and there’s a shift from novelty to normal life. And as the shift happens, that normality feels elusive. I think that’s because ‘normal’ here has yet to take shape and so I can feel myself vaguely looking for old ‘normal’ amidst these new settings. It makes me wish we could pop over to that frequently seen friend, or that those usual tea-time visitors could knock on the door, or that I’d see those familiar faces at church on Sunday.
As we left Leyland, we’d been there for three years. We’ve been here for three weeks. I know it’s early days. I expected the emotional rollercoaster. It’s just the reality of it is a little tiring!
While it’s not yet ‘normal’ here, I’m very thankful for the handful of people we’re gradually getting to know and who are beginning to make that elusive ‘normality’ a possibility.
It does get easier but it also never goes away! Keeping your eyes on Jesus helps, and being vulnerable and honest does too. Goodbyes still hurt!
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Thanks Helen 🙂 x
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Praying for you guys! What huge changes you have had. I would so love to knock on your door and share a cup of tea with you, Jonathan, Rufus and Billy. We need to make a trip out to see you soon!! 😘😘😘😘
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Would love that too Lindsay 🙂 x
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You are often on my heart, Felicity. These times of transition are hard and make me thankful that we belong to the One who does not change and who is steadfast in His love for us, no matter where our emotions roam. Praying for you often.
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